What do we do when life disappoints? Our natural reaction is to complain and grumble. We tell our sad story to anyone who will listen.
This is what I tend to do. Especially about the fact that my grandchildren live far away.
I make sure that all of my friends hear about my grandchildren in China—emphasis on China. I smile weakly as I talk about how much I miss them. When others talk about their grown children or grandchildren, I immediately remind them of my sad situation by sighing wistfully, “You are so lucky to have them close by.”
Thankfully, I have very sympathetic friends. They commiserate with me. They say, “Oh it would just kill me to have my kids so far away.” One friend even commented that my husband and I were the poster children (or would that be the poster parents?) for empty-nesters. He said everyone we knew could say, “At least we don’t have it as bad as John and Sharla.” Which made me laugh, but also served to worsen my case of poor-me-syndrome.
When our expectations are not met and we continue to yearn for the unattainable, we also tend to complain to God. All of our prayers start with the word, “Why?” We can’t come up with one good reason that God would have for not answering our prayers and giving us what we want.
When I have a really bad case of poor-me-syndrome, there are certain Bible passages I try to avoid. Passages like:
“Whom have I in heaven but you?
And there is nothing on earth that I desire besides you.
My flesh and my heart may fail,
but God is the strength of my heart and my portion forever.”
Psalm 73: 25-26
I brush over verses like this because I can’t seem to say, “God, there is nothing on earth that I desire besides you.” I’m ashamed to admit it. I want to be like the psalmist, but it just ain’t happening.
But if I stop avoiding the psalm and look at it a little closer, I notice that the psalmist did not come to those words easily. In the beginning of the psalm he was just like me asking, “Why do other people seem to have it so good?” It isn’t till the end of the psalm that he is able to come to the point of saying, “God is enough.”
And the answer is in the last verse of the psalm. Here he says, “But as for me, it is good to be near God” (verse 28). Being in God’s presence is what changes us.
Let that sink into your heart.
Nothing could be better than being near God.
Next step: Take all your disappointments to God. Then read Psalm 73 and rest in the assurance that even in the disappointments, God is near.
I begin with anger too often and then trickle into a state of depression. I also read right on over the same type verses. Then I pray why? Then I pray and get closer to God. Then and only then if I am fortunate He tells me why, I may be fortunate when He doesn’t too though. Some answers really are best left out of the equation of this life I’ve found. I follow all this up with a healthy dose of relationship with Him and then another disappointment comes along as they always do and I begin again at step one. I do seem to be getting better at not getting angry and depressed though so I’m certain He’s working on me as a work in progress. Love your honest approach and look forward to reading additional posts❤️
Thank you for your honesty Jakira. I’m right there with you on the anger and depression. I often start there too. We can only go back to step one and make that step one step closer to God.
Thank you Sharla for this beautiful post! I found your blog through Pinterest. I’ve been growing through a lot and your post was very heart felt. Thank you for your inspiration and wonderful advice. May God bless you always!